I don't want means I don't want...

Today I'm a bit vexed. (EE min is right...i only blog when I feel sad...tsk!)

Today I brought my galfren to see my parents. It was ok...nothing much. Idle chit chat...followed sitting at the couch watching TV.. Then i tot its a good time for her to leave so that she can reach home on time for dinner. And I was planning to eat dinner with her..

When I stepped out, she told me that I should just send her to JE MRT and go back home. She say that I should join my parents to go visiting.(My dad and mom want to go visit their friend who is also my sister's godfather, in the evening) Cause she sensed from the way my dad and mom has been asking about my plans in the evening, that they want me to join them. I said it was ok... I told my galfren that she was overly sensitive and that my parents din have that in mind. And she insisted. and..i don't know...became abit unhappy cuz...er...i dunno...either cuz i'm not willing to listen to her advice or i'm not willing to make my parents happy. And she keeps insisting. I became v unhappy. She keep telling me to just send her half the way. And she sort of ignored me...walked infront of me...and not beside me as usual...showing her displeasure. It hurts. But I guess she's hurt too cuz I did not listen to her. But all these actions...somewhat..only strengthens my resolve not to visit. Thats the thing about pple in my family...we have a rebellious streak in us. In the end, I phoned my sister(because she was out and my family wanted to wait for her before setting off) and she told me she would be back only 2 hours later. So I managed to convince my galfren to let me send her all the way and then i shall return. Which I did. And we had a peaceful ride to Tampines. When I came back...my heart was filled with dread. I just DONT WANT TO GO.... So i went home...but told my parents that I was tired and didn't want to go.

And now I'm here...writing in this blog. The thing abot me is that..i keep brooding over a subject....when I don't think there's proper closure. Because...its not taht the people that we were supposed to visit were bad guys or wat...they are v nice...i wouldn't have mind visiting them ANYday...but because of my galfren's insistence...it lead me to rebel and totally don't want to go at all. I mean...i have planned my day to be such and I told my parents that I would go to her house for dinner...I TOLD them....i hate to change my plans... i utterly hate to.. She knows it. Because there has been many a time when she has upsetted me because of changes in plans. I hate to change plans i hate to. And I din't felt that they wanted me to go. goodness..they themselves were 'tu'ing...not at all enthusiatic about going... My girlfriend's sensitivity is to be praised... and i do love her for her respect for her elders and sensitivity to their wants...but when I don't see the need...its just not justified. And I think her insistence...really...i think its true for all our family members...when someone seems to 'force their will' upon us...we will rebel... if we feel that its uncalled for... like how my brother..just stands there at the window..and cried for half an hour...because he felt taht washing plates was not his duty(it was my sister's but she was sleeping and there were only 2 plates and a big bowl...) Or maybe...like her...I felt that she wasn't listening...or trusting my judgement? Or maybe...is the look of her unhappy face.... knowledge that I've made her unhappy...that made me feel sad...having failed to keep her happy...

I guess it was the multitude of all these reasons that made me...upset...i just hope such things dun happen....too often...hahaha....life so long...confirm got such things happen...just hope dun happen that often...